I admit that last month when the Mega Millions jackpot was up to $1.6 billion I bought $10 worth of tickets and, although I knew I had most assuredly just flushed ten bucks down the proverbial toilet, for a couple of hours there I had a dream, a dream I might hit the jackpot and, lord help me, do something amazing with those blessed after-tax millions.
It goes without saying I didn't win, but that didn't stop me from dropping a sawbuck on another sort of lottery, the Honnold Foundation fundraiser being run by Omaze.com, where one lucky winner is going to get to spend a day doing whatever he or she wants to do--hiking, climbing, hanging out, even taking a nap or so the promotion claims--in Yosemite valley with Alex Honnold. Like the Mega Millions, I have serious doubts about winning; I'm sure, just like with the real lottery, some retired mill worker from Pensacola, Florida, or Watertown, South Dakota, is going to win. But let me dream.
What would I do with Alex Honnold if I won? I'd have him lead me up Astroman first thing in the morning and, if we dusted that puppy off fast enough (i.e., Alex didn't get tired dragging me up the Enduro Corner and through the Harding Slot), make a run at the Rostrum, that's what. I mean, there's some motivation to have him lead me up the Nose in a day, me leading the easy pitches then jugging the rest. Knowing Alex, he could probably haul me up the Nose before lunch. Honestly, that's probably the only way I could do the NIAD at this point. But I think I could manage Astroman. Who knows, I might actually be able to lead some of the pitches without completely embarrassing myself. And if we get tired, you know, we could maybe take a quick nap before hiking down to the Valley to do some post-climb pull-ups on Alex's hangboard.
If you have a dream, too, go to https://www.omaze.com/experiences/alex-honnold-yosemite and make a wager--I mean, donation. You don't have to be cheap and donate only $10; go nuts, donate $5,000! It's for a good cause and, hey, you can't win if you don't enter.
(Photo: Omaze.com.)
Postscript: I didn't win, but it was fun to dream. I'll just have to climb Astroman without Honnold dragging me along, I guess.